Sunday, 16 November 2008
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When we were in a small town in Washington, we built up a great community of people. We had a group of people we could turn to for help, conversation, laughter and learning. Many were people of Faith, Friends
or otherwise (mostly otherwise).
Directly from there, we went to China, where Mike, our friend Josh and I were 3 of 8 American teachers in a city of 3 million. While we made many friends and people were always there to help us if we needed, it was
difficult to make deep friendships.On returning to the US a year later, I knew I needed a community. I wanted it to be a group who took advantage of their surroundings to live life and enjoy God's gifts of art, creativity and ministry.
This brought up a quandry. I'm a Quaker. We settled in Tacoma, WA, and started attending a Friends Church. It didn't seem right, so we tried another one. It happened to be about 1/2 hour from our house. We've continued attending because it seems to be where we are called to gather to worship with Friends, but I don't feel that sense of community that I desire so greatly.
Recently, I read in a news article about people doing missional work in my neighborhood. I thought, "Hey, if people are working here, I want to get in on it!" So, I found out who they were and emailed them. We now join them weekly for Bible study, dinner and fellowship. We work on each other's homes, we go to concerts together, we generally have fun. Mike and I are the "old" folks in the group, being as we're in our mid 30's. Yeah. We're the old ones.
Here is the "thing": There are quite a few theological differences between us. They are very PreDestination. I think they focus on the rift between God and man with out recognizing the Light in all of John 1. Their church has only male elders.
I am confused. I am envious. Why can't I find a Friend's community like this? I want it all: the community and the similiar faith...
And now that I've written that I think I see it. I don't need it all.
How am I to grow if I surround myself with people who belive exactly as I do?
I heard somewhere that most people purchase books from a Christian
bookstore to confirm what they already believe.
I'm not a great Friends Theologian. I don't know how to answer or respond to many theological arguments.
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Comments (6)
This has been the bane of my life. While the Friends have been and are very close to my heart theologically (except for that predestination thing
), they, like most churches in America, don't have real community. And it's so, so hard to find real community in America. On the 18th I've got a post coming out on my blog reflecting on this issue, on the anniversary of Jonestown. There was a time when we had 100s of communes all over the U.S. Now it is so difficult to find them. And not that people are lesser Christians for not participating in them; just that the full glory and joy that Christ has to offer us can only be found in community. And right now, we Americans are the loneliest Christians on Earth.
reformed beliefs? Calvinists?
@karlamarie - I'm not too sure really. They are a non-denominational type group. One of those hip urban churches. Too bad you aren't around here anymore, I think you and Jer would love this group of people! Feel free to check them out. Just google Soma, Tacoma and it will come up. :)
Having recently returned from the field... I am also missing that sense of community and not finding it in my local meeting. I have toyed with the idea of finding another group - but I wonder if perhaps I need to be the one to initiate the community. Maybe the change I am seeking needs to start with me. Maybe I learned something overseas that I can bring back and share with my "community" that they don't even realize they have been missing. If we are all craving this kind of contact and closeness SO much... then why don't WE make it happen? (dramatic pause) and then I discover that people are still people and I remember how difficult it was/is to live in community and still love each other after the newness has worn off. Still - it's definitely worth a try. ~Jeanine
Del, you're realization moment reminds me of "As Good as it Gets" when Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson) steps out of his psychiatrist's office and into the waiting room with a group of depressed psychiatric patients and states, "What if this is as good as it gets?"
I think the Navy helped me come to that realization quickly:
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Hope you and your family had a Happy Thanksgiving.
James Carsner
@St_Elmo13 -
Yes, I like that scene. I wonder if its meant to be discouraging or encouraging? Mean, if that really is all there is, then we either need to start living in it and finding how we can make it better, well... its a sad place I guess!
Great to her from you! Call us! ;)